Zoë Is Different

I haven’t blogged in a long time. It isn’t because , there was nothing to say. I just, couldn’t say it. I’m not the kind of person that hides things. I’m so terrible at it. So,silence seemed the best way to deal with this.

In April, my beautiful little girl, had her 3 year wellness exam. Everything seemed fine. Except, the test. Not a blood test. The M-CHAT-R. Our lives have never been the same, since. She checked on 19- out of 20. We were devastated! HOW?! How, could our little girl, who counts to 23, knows all her colors and letters.. HOW IS THIS HAPPENING?!

Everything that -never made sense- suddenly made sense. But not really. Because, there’s no “sense” to this. Autism, or ASD or PDD-NOS or SPD. What’s going on here?! I can tell you this much.  A lot of tears.

Tears from a little girl, that can only be happy when she spins. A lot. A little girl, who used to love having her picture taken. Now- she just grabs the camera. A little girl, that can say SO MANY words…But, can’t talk to us. A little girl, that cries a lot – because we don’t understand.

It’s difficult as parents. I’m sure- it’s worse for her.

Zoë is different.

We love our Zoë.